A picture of Halsdoll thinking

My Thoughts on Art, Creativity and Blogging

Have you ever wondered why some people who identify themselves as an artist or creative person tend to be on the gloomy side? I often wonder why myself. If you put all the colors together, what will you get? The answer is black! I have yet to find a noncreative person who has never dressed like they are going to the funeral (oh no I’m not talking about tech bros here). It’s so avant-garde to be on the blue side of life. Well, it’s hard not to if you are literally a starving artist! Living a life of uncertainty is not healthy.

I played around with water color pencils. I’m feeling the artist’s hunger to improve. It’s a terrible drawing. Please Note: Artist’s hunger is not the same thing as having low-self esteem.

When I was a teenager, I used to doodle a lot. I used to draw fast sketches of made-up belief people. I even once drew a picture of one of my favorite singers from the band Angelfish and gave it to my art teacher in high school (I’m also a big-time music fan). She loved it. Giving away artwork was my way of compensating her for her time to write me a recommendation letter for scholarships. To be quite frank, it was really part of an English class assignment. It was a way for my English teacher to push kids to go to college. I really had no interest in going to art school or becoming an artist despite the fact I did pretty well in all of the art courses and classes I’ve taken throughout my school life. I remember very well how my art instructor’s eyes lit up when she skimmed through my art journal. She told me to keep a journal because she can tell I am a creative person based on the sporadic font size of my handwriting which never stayed horizontally straight and contained many doodles of random things. She is probably right. She is a professional artist and a scholar after all. To this day, I took her words to heart. Keeping a creative journal allows you to tap into your conscience and give it form. Well, at least that is why I do what I do or attempt to do with this blog as I gather my thoughts and information through writing reviews and sharing it with the public. I want a digital space to house my thoughts, but I often dream of doing something more creative with it.

So, the positive thing about this blog is that it serves me well. It does fulfill that void and lack of creativity in my life. As we all know, creativity is hard to monetize. So just because my blog has been quiet, it doesn’t mean I have abandoned it. Actually, I have been considering moving over to WordPress.org in the near future for my creative needs. I have tried other blogging platforms such as Blogger and Medium because they are more straightforward, but I didn’t like them much. Blogger feels outdated and you wouldn’t be able to find a community like WordPress. As much as I like to blog, I also like to read other blogs as well. Medium, on the other hand, felt like I was joining the rat race. I didn’t enjoy being exposed to articles on how to become a successful entrepreneur and often wonder if that was the type of community it attracts. Blogging about video games would most likely be shunned in that type of environment or ignored. Plus, it never occurred to me that I was trying to be a successful entrepreneur when I started this blog even though I put a lot of effort into writing and editing my blog posts compared to the average blogger. Perhaps, I just fancy myself becoming an exceptional writer one day simply because I enjoy writing. I want to live a peaceful life and write and not join the rat race and die from a heart attack!

Whenever I look back at my blog, I get a warm fuzzy feeling. It has evolved from talking to my plants to turning into something I am very proud of. But I know this blog has been quiet.

So the positive thing about this blog is that it serves me well. It does fulfill that void and lack of creativity in my life. As we all know, creativity is hard to monetize. So just because my blog has been quiet, it doesn’t mean I have abandoned it. Actually, I have have been considering moving over to WordPress.org in the near future for my creative needs. I have tried other blogging platforms such as Blogger and Medium because they are more straightforward, but I didn’t like it much. Blogger feels outdated and you wouldn’t be able to find a community like WordPress. As much as I like to blog, I also like to read other blogs as well. Medium on the other hand, felt like I was joining the rat race. I didn’t enjoy being exposed to articles on how to become a successful entrepreneur and often wonder if that was the type of community it attracts. Blogging about video game would most likely be shunned in that type of environment or ignored. Plus, it never occurred to me that I was trying to be a successful entrepreneur when I started this blog even though I put a lot of effort into writing and editing my blog posts compared to the average blogger. Perhaps, I just fancy myself becoming an exceptional writer one day simply because I enjoy writing. I want to live a peaceful life and write and not join the rat race and die from a heart attack!

Whenever I look back at my blog, I get a warm fuzzy feeling. It has evolved from talking to my plants to turning into something I am very proud of. But I know this blog has been quiet.

picture of a black and white cactus
My cactus is blooming stars (Picture taken by me in 2016).

I just need a little small break to collect my thoughts. Sometimes there are days when I don’t think of anything or consumed anything but just listen to white noise. And when I do feel mentally recharged, I find myself replaying White Knight Chronicles II, re-watching Glask Mask the anime, and reading Lord of the Flies. There’s no particular reason why I chose these particular items. They are just relaxing to me. So, I will be sure to share my thoughts in the near future so I don’t turn this blog into a GHOST TOWN as if it hasn’t already been years, but at least it gives me a safe place to express my true self. What more can I ask?

Well, that’s it for today’s little blog update. With cheer and happiness, see you. 🧸

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