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Thoughts on Social Media Dilemma

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First off, I want to mention I have an Instagram account and an abandoned Twitter (X) account. I am sure if I remain on it for too long, it would give me a mental breakdown. A ❤️ notification can light up someone’s day. Not enough of it–can break someone. This is especially true when they post something from their ❤️.

I watched this documentary (more like listened to it) while I was working. It was insightful and terrifying. The sound effects made the future seem ominous. Out-of-control AIs will overrun the internet. To save our sanity, we must delete and unplug our social media accounts for our mental health’s sake.

Let’s be frank, we are accustomed to comparing with one another, and tech companies know that. I feel terrible at times using it, even though I like to think I have a solid self-esteem. I started to wonder what’s wrong with me. Why can’t I feel a connection with these people even though I sometimes I agree with them? Maybe it was designed to be that way. It’s as if it knew that I can be competitive deep down. I feel this way when my ego is being stepped on. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . I don’t know. It didn’t make me feel good so I ended up talking to a teddy bear instead.

Now combined that knowledge with the money-making system, social media. This combination makes social media seem rather twisted. It’s alive because it’s driven by people’s clicks and likes. It’s like the movie, The Cube (1997). A bunch of people with different viewpoints are trapped inside a puzzle box. The only difference between the Cube (TV) and Social Media is that it’s 10 times worse! Not only are we watching TV, but the TV is watching us. Soon, we ended up buying or doing things based on what we were exposed to on the platform. To me, it feels like a gigantic billboard ad. I often wonder how I ended up with so many notebooks/journals after watching several influencers advertising it?

Overall, the documentary is quite educational. I am glad I watched it. For me personally, limiting oneself from using any technology-related product is impossible. This is especially true for those who live alone and/or who want to promote their business. For example, I find it hypocritical to advertise products that reduce digital consumption on social media platforms. How did I learned about these alternative activities in the first place? Social Media! I am just glad there are some rules and regulations set in place. If it’s making adults all jittery, I can only imagine the damage it has done to the most vulnerable.

Note: Originally posted on Sept 17, 2020; revised Nov. 24,2025.

The Sword of Swords (1968) Review

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The world of martial arts is nothing more than a world of politics. The one who has the most power has the most control over his fortune and the most freedom to live as he pleases (i.e., a king’s lifestyle). Doesn’t it sound enticing? But with great power comes great responsibility. Those who seek power for personal gain are not fit to rule. In this tale, a meek hero is hesitant to get involved in the world of martial arts until his family and his country are on the line.

To give you folks a backstory of this legendary sword, I quote the introduction from the film for you to better understand the story:

During the Sung Dynasty, about 1000 B.C., a famed sword smith Meng Yao Chi took ten years to forge a sword from the best metal available. When China was invaded by the neighboring Liao state, Meng presented his sword to General Meng Liang. With it, the General won battle after battle and the sword became a legend. After General Meng’s Death, the sword was lost until rediscovered in the Ming Dynasty. The prince of a nearby barbarian tribe coveted the sword and dispatched a trusted warrior to acquire it. This is the story of this mission.

Based on the quote, the sword sounds pretty epic, doesn’t it? I don’t think I would want the sword even if I was fit to rule the martial arts world. It’s too much stress and responsibility. So, I can sympathize with the hero in this film who learned martial arts to hunt and nothing more. However, our destiny is not always decided by us. The hero, not only has the mental capacity but also the physical strength to be the keeper of the legendary sword. After all, those who yield the sword have the power to control the land for good or evil. It sounds kind of like Lord of the Rings, the Chinese version the more I think about it, but not as dark.

What surprised me about this story is how passive and meek the main character is. I have never seen a highly skilled martial artist who is unreasonably meek. His saint-like personality is his downfall. It is his reluctance to kill the main villain when he had the chance that caused him a spiral of tragic events. As the audience, I can’t help but be a little annoyed by his passiveness, but then again, there wouldn’t be a story if he weren’t a reluctant hero. He eventually learned from his mistake and become emotionally stronger towards the end, but at the expense of losing his parents, sister, and his two eyes! On a positive note, what I like about this film is that the hero’s weakness becomes his strength. The hero always finds a way to win in the end magically, which makes me feel happy. After all, I am always rooting for the good guy to win.

For my final thoughts, this film is decent but not great. I like The One-Armed Swordsman (1967) more which was played by the same main actor, Jimmy Wang Yu. One plus thing about this film is the cinematography and sword fighting. It’s beautifully well done. So if you are a fan of martial arts films, it’s still worth watching.

Originally published 26, 2020; Revised Oct. 02, 2025

Love and Fortune Review

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Have you ever eaten anything that tasted sweet and then the more you bit into it, it became bitter and tangy? I just described my emotions for Love and Fortune. Love and marriage are happy endings for most women. But some are just unlucky–meeting the wrong guy at the right time, and meeting the right guy at the wrong time. The maternal clock is always ticking. Women have one shot at finding “happiness” and sadly some may never achieve it at all. Oh, the pain of having a period in life! Sometimes, it hurts so much that we need to take painkillers.

If this show sounds all doom and gloom, far from it. It’s a sweet little show that made me laugh more than cry. All thanks to the great cinematography shots, my eyes were glued to the screen. It’s a show about a woman in her 30s who is conflicted with societal expectations (i.e., getting married, having children, being successful) and who happens to fall in love with a 15-year-old boy. Yes, I said it, a 15-year-old boy. Now, I know what you are thinking–she is a pedophile. She is gross, but let’s look at her situation with a magnifying glass–the detail.

Wako Taira, the protagonist, is aware of her age. Like any normal woman, she wants to get married, but her relationship with her boyfriend of three years is in limbo. The romance is not there. He looks down on her, constantly nagging her to quit her part-time job at the cinema and find a real job. She does all the housework. He comes home late drunk wanting to have sex–but never returning the favor when she wants it. So, what happens to a neglected woman? She finds love and hope elsewhere, and that’s where Yumeaki Iko (the high-school boy) comes into the picture.  She strikes gold when she learns that he shares the same love for cinema as her. Finally, she found someone who understood her and her passion! But unfortunately, he is half her age! This series do question patriarchal society and gender inequality with seriousness and humor. If men can fall in love with younger women, why can’t women fall in love with younger men?

Don’t be fooled though by my light approach to this review, even though it may seem as if I’m endorsing the female protagonist’s behavior as female empowering, I don’t think the relationship between a high school boy and a woman twice his age would work out (the same can be said vice versa). For one, there’s no equality in that sort of relationship. The woman becomes someone like a mom to her young lover, and that’s not fair and romantic at all! I’m speaking from a feminist standpoint here. Despite my beliefs, I appreciate how this series prompted me to ask those big societal questions: Why is it more acceptable for a high school girl to fall in love with a man twice her age and not the other way around? Why do women have to sacrifice their creative pursuits because their maternity clock is ticking? Why is a woman’s worth measured by her childbearing capability and not her talents? And the most important question, which coincides with age, why is a woman’s worth determined by her beauty. If she doesn’t reach all of her dreams within her prime, she becomes less valuable in society. Think about why the terms old hags, old maids, and old witches are so offensive. Well, that’s because most likely they can’t conceive, and therefore, they are “bad apples”.

Love and Fortune is an interesting show if you are looking for something intelligent, well-crafted, and horrifyingly comical but very real to the problems that some women have to go through. The show makes me wonder, why is life so bittersweet? If you ask me, I kind of like biting into bad apples. They sure make a good story.

Note: Originally posted July 31, 2020; Revised and edited June 13, 2022.

The Garden of Sinners (2007) Review: The Story that Romanticized a Murderer

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My mother once warned me not to philosophize too much about the darker things in life. It takes you to a very gloomy place devoid of warmth and life. Dive deep into the world of the unknown, you might just end up in a mental hospital. So, let’s not go there. But if you insist, then this anime is the one for you! Okay, I am harsh. Just kidding. This anime is soothing despite its dark content. I really feel like I’m in the movies!

Garden of Sinners is based on a novel series by Kinoko Nasu. It tells a story about a high school girl with a split personality. Her name is Shiki Ryougi. She has a supernatural ability to see death and has a devouring burden to kill. But why? If you are into big questions about your boyish aggression in finding pleasure in destroying everything your way (i.e., playing violent games), you might find this show super cool, but I wouldn’t say profoundly enlightening. Rationalizing the concept of what constitutes a murderer doesn’t justify the desire to kill as a noble behavior. The argument in this anime is that you’re not a killer if you kill to protect those you love but is that just an excuse? It’s an exhilarating emotion close to love, according to the show. Shiki, the protagonist is set free when she has the chance to kill off murderers like herself and the fighting scenes really do illustrate that point. She even wants to kill the man she loves! It’s a struggle. It’s so poetic! As an audience, I think we are supposed to sympathize with her. She is battling against her masculine side, the desire to destroy and kill everything!

According to Wiki, this show is classified as dark fantasy. But I like to think of it as a supernatural show with elements of philosophical horror. Sounds kind of cool, doesn’t it? You see, the show is different and purposely complex. I felt as if I’m taking an introduction class to philosophy, listening to young adults discussing morality. And apparently, no matter what culture you were born into, teenagers care a lot about being unique and different (referring to the villain). In addition, some of the movies have different running times. Some are 1 to 2 hours long. There are only 10 episodes altogether. Most anime break into 26 or 12 episodes. Did I confuse you yet? I know I was when the word movie was used interchangeably with the episode for someone who occasionally watches anime. But that’s okay! I think this anime is meant for those who enjoy watching a show for the second time around! Good for brain exercise. Good for philosophy class! Cheers!

Overall, these long episodes which are called movies left me feeling kind of jaded at certain times during my viewing. Perhaps, it’s because I already did all this philosophizing thing in my teenage years and in my 20s. So personally, I sort of exhausted myself from the deep conversations of philosophy, which is trying to understand one’s aggression in relation to the universe. Unnecessary complexity for the purpose of complexity’s sake is not a good thing in terms of plot and this show is just that unless I’m missing the entire point of the show due to loss in translation. If that is the case, it’s a shame because I really connect with the melancholic vibes from this anime.

I might sound rather nitpicky with my review when in fact I enjoyed this anime. It’s an attractive anime with pretty moving illustrations that made me feel as if I was at the cinema. You know the immersive feeling you get at the theatre sitting in a pitch-black room? Yes, I felt it through the anime visual presentation watching with my headphones on. The sound effects and soundtrack are of high quality. Unfortunately, I couldn’t appreciate it to its max since I don’t find the protagonist’s struggles relatable even though I like dolphins* and I find the order in which the movies are arranged a bit bothersome. But hey, at least I gave this a shot. I can only imagine how the tone of the anime would change if it is titled Garden of Saints. Yeah…that doesn’t sound so edgy.

Note: Dolphins* is in reference to the blog post over at I drink and watch anime: “Anime Fans are Murderers?” I thought it was funny how dolphins are used to illustrate that someone who likes dolphins can be murderous. Ouch! Nobody likes being attacked. Let’s not group and generalize people based on their interests. I think that was the point of her blog post.

3 Poetic Movies I Watched

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I’m becoming a bit lazy with my introduction or maybe I don’t have much esteem for the fast pace society we have become. Not all of us like reading drawn out long rambling paragraphs. So, I will spare you the trouble and give you my list. Perhaps, you might find something worthwhile to watch.

Roman Holiday (on Amazon Prime)

  • Release date: September 2, 1953
  • Director: William Wyler

What is a real holiday? A one without a schedule? Being able to breathe and enjoy the simple things in the present moments that are. This film sure captures it –black and white breathtakingly beautiful shots, especially Audrey Hepburn who looks like a flower with her tiny waist. The male actor, Gregory Peck also looks a quite handsome pairing up with the actress. It’s quite wholesome, sweet, and just like a dream to watch two people flirting. It’s one of those feel-good films where you just want to take a short break from doing whatever you are doing and relax with a cup of coffee, tea, or a glass of wine, depending on your preference. Just let the stress melt away. Like a photograph, each scene was mesmerizing and I just realized movies are just moving photographs. Ah…I am dreaming of a holiday in the comfort of my living room.

Rear Window (on Amazon Prime)

  • Release date: August 4, 1954
  • Director: Alfred Hitchcock

I don’t think I have seen an artistic suspense film that occurs in one view, sitting by the window. I love the concept and I believe Silent Hill 4, a survival horror game for the Playstation 2, may have been influenced by this idea of being trapped in an apartment. The plot reminds me of the board game Clue, which involves solving a murder mystery. It’s far from scary but suspenseful enough to be entertained. A news photographer plays the detective and watches his interesting, colorful neighbors going about doing their business until he suspects a murder has been committed just from watching them from his window. The whole feel of the film reminds me of staring inside a doll house. It’s very staged and I sort of like that. Try the film, you might enjoy watching a glamor ad. The film did end with a fashion magazine Bazaar. Fashionably bizarre film indeed. Now, I want to live in one of those apartments, but I don’t want to be spied on by a peeping tom news photographer.

Words Bubble Up Like Soda Pop (on Netflix)

  • Initial release: July 22, 2021 (Japan)
  • Director: Kyohei Ishiguro

This cute animation made me realize teenagers these days must have it hard growing up with social media and smartphones. It only amplifies low-esteem and depression. At that age, I remember I was trying to find my identity through music. There wasn’t a lot of distraction from the outside world called Cable T.V., especially not in my household. We get our entertainment from video cassettes and public channels. So, I can only imagine feeling overwhelmed if I were a teenager from this time being exposed to so many influencers from all over the world. The result would be to hide in poetry. Like the male protagonist, I was a shy kid too. Some of us don’t like to draw attention to ourselves because we want to avoid involuntary blushing. Overall, the animation is vibrant and stylish. It feels old but new. Same teenager issues, but just set in a different time.

That’s it for my list of three. Hope you found something worthwhile to watch as well.

Reflecting on The Duchess of Duke Street Season 1

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Lately, anything that inspires me to cook, I watch. And this English show is no exception! Cooking is something I’m not good at which is why I came up with Halsdoll’s Diner. How’s my progress so far you might wonder? My mother would have been proud. I gained 7 pounds since I started cooking, considering the fact I used to be shapelessly thin. And yet, I still have yet to find recipes I enjoy. You see, you got to have a passion for cooking and mine is not as strong as the protagonist Louisa Trotter who is known as the Queen of Cook and who is actually based on the real-life character, Rosa Lewis.

“I want to be a COOK!” said Louisa. And that’s all she ever wanted even till the end. Sadly, along the way she had to deal with the politics that come with it, especially being a woman in the 1920s when women are expected to walk in the shadow of their husbands. What I find so intriguing about The Duchess of Duke Street is to see an ambitious woman rising from the bottom as an assistant cook into a proprietor of a famous hotel in London. Of course, she didn’t do it all alone. The circumstance she was in led her to success. She caught the attention of royalty and got involved in an affair. Simply because she is a great cook and attractive. To cover up the affair, she was persuaded to marry her husband, a butler to whom she had no love. They moved into a house, and soon needed to make a living. So, they took over a hotel business. Unfortunately, her husband was a lousy manager and a drunk. Instead of bringing in revenue, he brought debt. As a result, she kicked him out and took up his manager position to turn the business around. Who says women can’t manage? Louisa Trotter can!

Not going to lie. I love strong resistant women. All she ever wanted was to be a cook and she had to work twice as hard to get where she wanted to be. Sometimes she didn’t always get the moral support from her female kinds. For instance, when her respectable trusted employee named Mary got into a dispute with her over a male guest, she called out the most hurtful thing to Louisa. She said Louisa “slut” her way into acquiring the hotel. It was a big blow to the ego. Louisa knew it was partially true. She was young and passionate when she started out and so there were a lot of male admirers. Trying to fend them off was not easy. After all, “Men are born to chase after women, otherwise, there’d be no human race,” said Louisa. Clearly, not only did she display a concern for her business but she also protected those around her. That’s what I called an amazing woman. Of course, it didn’t stop there. People started spreading rumors that the hotel is a brothel when it started to gain popularity. Working girls, you say? Not quite but they were indeed working hard to make a living in the hospitality industry. It’s not uncommon to see Louisa boldly surrounded by men.

Overall, The Duchess of Duke Street is a show about management, friendship, food, hard work, and love which made me realize not much has changed in regard to women’s struggles in the male-dominated industry. Luckily, I don’t have sophisticated big dreams. As long as I can find metaphors to write about on this blog and cook a nice meal that alone makes me very happy.

Halsdoll eating breakfast
Halsdoll’s Breakfast
Halsdoll’s Grilled Cheese Sandwich with strawberries on the side

Thanks for reading my thoughts on this T.V series. As mentioned, I am open for business on the day I say I publish a post. Perhaps, there’s something more worthwhile next time. For me, it was a comforting show because a bit of Louisa personality reminded me of my mother. I wouldn’t mind being her apprentice.