Blogging

Making a Checklist for Books & Games

May 18, 2025November 20, 2025HalsdollLeave a comment

Have you ever had a hard time deciding whether you like something or not? I have had many experiences playing games and reading books. Sometimes I cannot pinpoint why I don’t enjoy something as much as I should. So, I like to write out my thoughts in the form of a review. Unfortunately, these days, I don’t have that luxury anymore. The truth is, my work (apart from my health) has been so demanding that all of my hobbies were at a standstill. It’s already close to the middle of the year. I have only completed three games: Spirit of the North, developed by Infuse Studio; Xanadu Next, developed by Nihon Falcom; and the Bookwalker, developed by Do My Best. No time for mental health and recreation is not good. So here I am back with one of my favorite pastime activities: making a list. I have always found it therapeutic to make a list of books and games because it helps me clear my mind and stay focused.

Out of the three games I’ve played this year, the one I enjoyed the most is Xanadu Next. The game design is superb, however, the game is buggy. I had to restart a boss fight three times! If you enjoy a soul-like game, then this game is a treat. Well, I believe this game came before the souls franchise. Playing this game made me realized how much I enjoy treasure hunting, good level design and challenging games.

Which brings me to the next game I will be playing. Spontaneously, I decided I needed something more relaxing and casual. I dipped my foot into Skyrim Definitive Edition and Oblivion Remastered because I want to transport myself into a fantasy world that’s not too brutal. So far, I have been enjoying these two games. Then I realized I have Eiyuden Chronicle: Hundred Heroes, which I started last year, but never completed. At the time, anything that required a big time investment, I shied away. Now that things are settling down a bit, I can sit down and relax with a good RPG. Recruiting heroes is fun. But so far, I enjoy the cooking challenge the most and have found collecting recipes to be just as fun as recruiting interesting characters. This game is my ideal game of what I call relaxing.

*Currently,* *I don’t have a recipe that will beat my opponent. His ramen is delicious.*

As for my reading list, I only have a handful of unread books. I created a list of books I would eventually love to read, but do not have a set time to complete them. If you are reading for pleasure, why set a goal? These pastime activities should be a form of relaxation. I have been quite satisfied with what I have read so far. I completed ~~Beast Warriors~~ Beast Player by Nahoko Uehashi and The Tenant of Wildfell Hall by Anne Brontë. Currently reading The Hunch Back of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo. I enjoy the books mainly for their beautiful metaphors.

When I was researching ways to organize my reading and gaming list, I came across other apps and sites that help with just that, but I adore my blog. Why abandon it for something else like Notion? I can simply use WordPress tools to organize a list and create a separate page for my blog so I can go back to check off my reading list. Notion, Steam, Instagram, Goodreads, Amazon, and Google have a good section for reviewing items, but I think I am perfectly fine with my scattered notes and images here on this blog until WordPress decides to shut down.

So, do you have a way of organizing your books and games or other media you consume? I am extremely curious. Perhaps you can share 1 or 2 tips.

Credits: the images on this blog post are taken from Xanadu Next and Eiyuden Chronicle: Hundred Heroes

Finding My Voice

July 13, 2023December 11, 2023HalsdollLeave a comment

I have always wanted to join a book club or some sort of club, particularly a literature club where we discuss big and small concepts; where our ideas become challenged; and are safe to express. But as an introvert, I often prefer to do the thinking and reading alone in a quiet environment. In public meetings, rarely will you find me leading a group discussion. Instead, I am the one in the background observing and listening. So, I don’t know how useful it would be for me to join a book club. This is part of the reason why I blog.

There’s another reason why I am not in a book club, I am an avid gamer who believes that great ideas are not limited to books. I want to discuss video games, which is a medium that is not widely understood. If it were, many gamers wouldn’t have to advocate its benefits and rewards to the mass, and WHO wouldn’t have called it an addiction. Luckily, most of my peers are accepting of the hobby because it’s now mainstream, but many of them prefer spending time doing something else more “productive”.

I like to think that writing reviews and keeping an online diary is somewhat productive. The writing process helps polish and refine my thoughts into something visible for my eyes to feast on. As a result, the labor of my fruit becomes edible and digestible enough to satisfy my creative appetite, but I know it’s not enough to stand on its own as a creative merit. People don’t read blogs for artistic inspiration but rather to start a conversation. And yet here I am writing poetic reviews, which is a craft I learned to love. You see, I have always been a thinker, but not a good communicator. So, I thought writing for this blog on topics and subjects I am interested in will help make me become a better communicator, which to me is just another term for being a good storyteller.

Looking back on one of my blog posts, What’s in a Name? I never treated this blog as a stepping stone in hoping one day I would become a well-renowned writer. Realistically that would be a stretch as I am far from obtaining such a title. There are many talented marginalized writers out there in America and yet the road to mainstream acceptance is far. Perhaps this is just a mental block for allowing a Modern Lit professor to dissuade me from writing. For a long time, I never took a step back to observe that he had his inner demons to fight with. In his eyes, all he saw was an Asian student. I often wonder to this day, what did China have to do with Western Modern Lit? Perhaps, it’s true that I was not a strong writer back then, but I believe his statement was more of an attack against China than me as an individual. He wasn’t too fond that China was sending its students overseas to learn technology and science to better its society whereas the U.S. was (and is still) too busy making toys. What I was experiencing was a form of microaggression. I came to the white man to teach me how to think and write in his culture, but instead, he discouraged me. Woah, the last sentence didn’t sound so pretty, but so was my interaction with that teacher.

As I am writing this blog post, a part of me is regretful for believing in the biggest lie that I was simply just not good at writing. One person didn’t believe in my ability, but there were also a few who were rooting for me. In a world where people are fighting to be heard, it’s important to find your voice because sometimes the rest can sound like noise, especially if it’s not constructive or helpful in any way.

….

Coming up, more Elden Ring content. The game is so massive, but I am making progress. Not too long ago, I made fun of Vayne from Final Fantasy XII, needing to calm down before he popped a vein. Well, I nearly popped mine trying to beat the bosses in Elden Ring, haha. Since I am a bit burnt out from this game, writing, and with this terrible prairie summer’s heat, I will try to get the blog post whenever I can.

It’s Been 5 Years…Is It Game Over?

March 30, 2023October 20, 2023Halsdoll1 Comment

My Blogging Pet Peeves (Gaming Blog)

September 2, 2022October 7, 2022Halsdoll1 Comment

Most of the time, I am pretty level-headed and many people (offline that is. I’m not active on social media) said I am pleasant to be around. I am polite, hard-working, and considerate. Even my former boss said I am the nicest person in the world! Wow, I felt so honored to be called that. I suppose you don’t meet a lot of people who skip to work when work sometimes feels like running into a battle. I’m an optimist and sometimes a bit too overconfident by default, which is not always a great thing. I think it’s partly because I have a lot of alone time for reflection. I think and then write, edit then revise. As a result, this blog helps me stay sane, calm, collected, and understanding. Unfortunately, I wish I can say that my blogging experience has been very good. There are some blogging annoyances. Some have to do with indexing issues but it’s more to do with the blogging gaming community that I run into which cannot be helped, but can it?

It’s been a while since I did my 3-list blog post where I just make 3 lists of anything for fun. It’s a great writing exercise. So, today’s topic will be on blogging pet peeves. Brace yourself because this is not a positive, uplifting post, but I hope it’s insightful. I will try to keep it light.

#1) Passive Aggressive Blog Posts

I can never understand gaming bloggers who disrespect their readers. They should be happy that someone follows them because there’s a possibility that they are genuinely interested in their content. What irks me is when bloggers think their readers are inferior to them. I followed a female gaming blog that thought it would be funny to review a coloring book game for little girls just so she can make fun of it. I wish I understood the humor because if I were a kid, I think I’d like the game. The game is intended for little girls and not for full-grown adults. I guess making fun of a little girl’s game makes someone appears bigger?

2#) What Does It Really Mean to Be a Feminist?

I followed a few feminist bloggers back then. I learned that not all feminists (males included) agree with scantily clad women or lipstick feminists. I believe in equality too, but I don’t see a problem with women who are in tune with their feminine side. If you want to pay for my meal after a hard long day of killing zombies, hunters, and lickers, I got no objection. I’ll cover for you next time as long as I can afford it. Sadly, gender inequality pay is still a thing here in the U.S for the girly girl. There’s nothing more irritating than being called a gold-digger just because you are broke from trying to compete in a society that praises and rewards masculine over feminine traits unless you sell your body. I hope you can tell I’m joking. It’s a double joke. If you have played Resident Evil Revelations, I’m referencing and mocking a gamer’s comment I found on a gaming forum about Jessica. Some people called Jessica a gold-digger because she demanded Clive R. O’Brian, another character from the game, to take her out to eat after they are done with their job. You can’t see it in the picture below, but she is wearing a makeup bag around her waist. This portrayal of the woman always irks me a little. What’s so bad with keeping up with appearance while on the job? It’s empowering.

Jessica posing — Jessica Sherawat from Resident Evil Revelations

#3) Competitive Bloggers

I support friendly competition, but I don’t support catty competition where someone tries to discredit me by telling me what I like is not cool enough and what they like is better. What’s the point of following each other only to stress each other out? There were a few times I would leave comments only to get pushed back by anxiety-driven gamers who need a lot of work in the self-esteem department. They should be happy at least someone commented on their blog. It means they took the time to read and think about what you got to say. Isn’t that why people blog in the first place? Sometimes I wonder if it has to do with my pen name, Halsdoll. If you are curious, you can check my blog post about the meaning behind my pen name. My pen name was never intended to sound seductively alluring to support the patriarchal society, but somehow, I get pushed aside. The indie gaming community seems to be conflicted with all things femininity because 1) girls are just so weaaak (and that is not a typo); 2) the damsel in distress is not only a threat to another woman’s resources but she is also dead weight, and 3) the shameless hussy woman relied on her looks to get what she wants from men. You see, the suspicion towards women will never end because women were never seen on an equal level to men for having ambitions and desires separate from their counterparts despite the fact that gaming is so mainstream now that even your grandma is probably gaming as we speak and tweeting about it on Twitter!

It always seems like it’s the frailest one who has the strongest determination on the battleground-screen shots from 13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim

Ryoko Shinome: I won't let anyone else fight for me screen shot

There you have it, my 3 blogging pet peeves, which most people probably cannot relate to, but hey this is my blog and I thought it might be worth sharing since nerds really do like exchanging information. It just shows that oh my, the quiet Asian woman can be so straightforward and have such strong opinions contrary to what some people think. Never assume. I hope you found this post insightful because I was never the type who like to complain for the sake of complaining.

My Thoughts on Art, Creativity and Blogging

July 27, 2022October 1, 2022Halsdoll1 Comment

Have you ever wondered why some people who identify themselves as an artist or creative person tend to be on the gloomy side? I often wonder why myself. If you put all the colors together, what will you get? The answer is black! I have yet to find a noncreative person who has never dressed like they are going to the funeral (oh no I’m not talking about tech bros here). It’s so avant-garde to be on the blue side of life. Well, it’s hard not to if you are literally a starving artist! Living a life of uncertainty is not healthy.

I played around with water color pencils. I’m feeling the artist’s hunger to improve. It’s a terrible drawing. **Please Note:** Artist’s hunger is not the same thing as having low-self esteem.

When I was a teenager, I used to doodle a lot. I used to draw fast sketches of made-up belief people. I even once drew a picture of one of my favorite singers from the band Angelfish and gave it to my art teacher in high school (I’m also a big-time music fan). She loved it. Giving away artwork was my way of compensating her for her time to write me a recommendation letter for scholarships. To be quite frank, it was really part of an English class assignment. It was a way for my English teacher to push kids to go to college. I really had no interest in going to art school or becoming an artist despite the fact I did pretty well in all of the art courses and classes I’ve taken throughout my school life. I remember very well how my art instructor’s eyes lit up when she skimmed through my art journal. She told me to keep a journal because she can tell I am a creative person based on the sporadic font size of my handwriting which never stayed horizontally straight and contained many doodles of random things. She is probably right. She is a professional artist and a scholar after all. To this day, I took her words to heart. Keeping a creative journal allows you to tap into your conscience and give it form. Well, at least that is why I do what I do or attempt to do with this blog as I gather my thoughts and information through writing reviews and sharing it with the public. I want a digital space to house my thoughts, but I often dream of doing something more creative with it.

So, the positive thing about this blog is that it serves me well. It does fulfill that void and lack of creativity in my life. As we all know, creativity is hard to monetize. So just because my blog has been quiet, it doesn’t mean I have abandoned it. Actually, I have been considering moving over to WordPress.org in the near future for my creative needs. I have tried other blogging platforms such as Blogger and Medium because they are more straightforward, but I didn’t like them much. Blogger feels outdated and you wouldn’t be able to find a community like WordPress. As much as I like to blog, I also like to read other blogs as well. Medium, on the other hand, felt like I was joining the rat race. I didn’t enjoy being exposed to articles on how to become a successful entrepreneur and often wonder if that was the type of community it attracts. Blogging about video games would most likely be shunned in that type of environment or ignored. Plus, it never occurred to me that I was trying to be a successful entrepreneur when I started this blog even though I put a lot of effort into writing and editing my blog posts compared to the average blogger. Perhaps, I just fancy myself becoming an exceptional writer one day simply because I enjoy writing. I want to live a peaceful life and write and not join the rat race and die from a heart attack!

Whenever I look back at my blog, I get a warm fuzzy feeling. It has evolved from talking to my plants to turning into something I am very proud of. But I know this blog has been quiet.

picture of a black and white cactus — My cactus is blooming stars (Picture taken by me in 2016).

I just need a little small break to collect my thoughts. Sometimes there are days when I don’t think of anything or consumed anything but just listen to white noise. And when I do feel mentally recharged, I find myself replaying White Knight Chronicles II, re-watching Glask Mask the anime, and reading Lord of the Flies. There’s no particular reason why I chose these particular items. They are just relaxing to me. So, I will be sure to share my thoughts in the near future so I don’t turn this blog into a GHOST TOWN as if it hasn’t already been years, but at least it gives me a safe place to express my true self. What more can I ask?

Well, that’s it for today’s little blog update. With cheer and happiness, see you. 🧸

What’s in a Name?

October 18, 2021October 24, 2022Halsdoll3 Comments

What was supposed to be a hobby and a side activity has now become a passionate pastime or it’s just I’m addicted to writing. I put so much effort into crafting my blog posts and have found so much joy in doing it. Fishing for metaphors is an art form in itself. And yet, it’s just not looking for metaphors, I also appreciate everything artistic about the making of films, TV shows, books, and video games. I like all forms of art and enjoy critiquing them. Have I ever thought of becoming a critic or a writer myself? Not really because attempting to consume what has already been produced may take a lifetime to discover and appreciate. Plus, I have the attention span of a child to even sit and write a book. On the other hand, writing lyrics, poems and reviews come more naturally. Articulating my thoughts into a post is my idea of fun. And why not do it with style? Did some readers actually think I was attempting to write masterpiece reviews? That’s quite laughable. I’m flattered.

This brings to the question, of why I choose to write as Halsdoll and not my real name after contemplating whether I should use my real name or not. After all, the hard work should go to its rightful owner. In addition, I feel like I owe an explanation whenever I introduced someone I know in person to my blog. They may be puzzled by the name but are too afraid to ask: Why Halsdoll?

“What is in a name?” I quote Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare. Plenty, it’s about branding. The name Halsdoll was inspired by Shakespeare’s characters from Henry IV Part II: Prince Hal and Doll Tearsheet. The name was created as a joke. You see, Prince Hal understood the world by visiting Mistress Quickly Inn and Doll is one of the working girls. It really is no place fit for a soon-to-be king, but what may seem like an unproductive pastime activity actually served him fruitful information on his subjects. Yes, of all the places, a brothel. If you want to be a respected leader, you learn from the bottom up. It’s humorous and humor is what keeps me sane. I could elaborate, but this is no academic blog for a lengthy research paper behind the meaning of my pen name (as if who cares?). Plus, I just like the sound of Halsdoll. It sounds like the name of a powerful medication, a clothing brand, or the brand of a cosmetic product. It’s a nice staged name for all my nonsense stuff on this blog.

So after much thought about whether to use my real name to sound professional and build credibility with my readers, I decided to stick with my pseudonym. Perhaps, one day I may reveal my name when my blog grows big. In the meantime, I just like being Halsdoll. The name reminds me to never let the inner child in me die because the grownup world is nothing but filled with heart-attack stress and the sad part is we don’t have to make it that way but we do it anyway.

P.S.

This post was inspired by a Twitter email notification, hinting to me that I should use my real name because people feel more comfortable interacting with someone real. I do want this blog to grow. However, a hacker once said to me that my birth name doesn’t sound real, so what’s the irony in that?