Picture of shredded papers

Tidying Up and Sweeping My Thoughts

I am guilty of taking the easy route by not coming up with something fresh like I normally do for my weekly post. Normally, I think about what I want to write but not this time. I’m allowing my mind to roam despite my best effort to attempt decorating my blog with Halloween topics. I found myself uninspired and motivated to write about witches, wolves, demons, clowns, etc. However, around this time of season, I did enjoy free candy and horror shows as a kid, but I was never the type who go out of my way to dress up for the occasion. I remember I went trick or treating in my normal clothes with my friend from school in my neighborhood when I was about 12 years old. One of the neighbors was shocked and asked us why we didn’t dress up. I believe I said I’m dressing up as myself. That’s scary enough. He looked disappointed but gave us candy anyway. Ever since I quit celebrating the holiday until a couple of years ago when I learned from my old workplace that dressing up in Halloween costumes can be fun. People from the West Coast are more relaxed and in tune with their inner child than people from the Mid West who seem more fixated on punctuality and clean desks, or maybe I am generalizing. I highly doubt I could find another workplace that has a relaxed culture that resemble a dysfunctional family like the family from the film Little Miss Sunshine or Twin Peaks, although there was no death involved in the workplace. Everyone was on the quirky side and that made me feel at home. I enjoyed my co-workers who brought me a lot of laughter and made me feel warm and fuzzy.

The stuffed animals I accumulated from my co-workers. They just sit on my desk cheering me on. The funny part is I am not really into stuffed animals.

Recently, I had a job interview for a position where I am more than qualified. I knew the interviewer asked me if there were anything else not showing up on my resume. In my head, I thought of my blog. Then she asked me how organized am I on a scale from 1 to 10. That question stumped me because asking a creative person to be organized is the equivalent of asking her to die. Instantly, I knew I don’t belong in that environment. It’s a place full of first time moms who are particular with punctuality and routine. Well, I do understand why. After all, they are dealing with clients’ financial assets so everything has to be organized and structured. I could pretend to be all put together, but I am not all that traditional despite my reserved personality. When I told them I was looking for work-life balance, I wasn’t thinking of starting a family and becoming a mom, I was thinking of having more time for my creative pursuits. I knew on the spot I wasn’t a great fit. It seems that the girls treat each other like family and support life outside of work, but it’s a different type of lifestyle that I had in mind. I could only imagine how stuck I’d feel in an environment where motherhood is everything. I don’t know if I will ever be one. Either way, I’m content just focusing on my creative projects whether it’s gathering my mom’s recipes and turning it into a cookbook, crafting a poem, going for a long walk, writing a short story or finding the perfect wardrobe. Those simple things make me happy.

I could publish more frequently if I talk what’s from the heart because it feels effortless. It’s healthy to do some house cleaning because it’s the reflection of the mind. Then I can go back to enjoying my hobbies and enjoying life. But more importantly, sleep better, which is something I have been struggling for years.

Well that is it for today. Thanks for reading Halsdoll’s Time, where news is often irrelevant, but I hope you can find some sunshine in your life. I shall leave you with this excellent music soundtrack from Little Miss Sunshine.

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